How to Handle the Hardest Situations (Clinician Series)
Calling all clinicians - this conversation is for you.
How do you handle someone giving you feedback, as a therapist? How do you handle a situation where the feedback is negative or hurtful? As clinicians, we have an obligation to explore whatever the person in front of us is bringing to us. We have to put our feelings aside (to a certain extent) during this conversation, despite it being an almost impossible thing to do.
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In this week’s episode, I’m diving into the hard situations that you may face as a clinician.
In the world of therapy and healthcare, clinicians often find themselves on the receiving end of challenging feedback from clients. Whether you're a dietitian, therapist, psychiatrist, or any medical provider, you may have encountered moments when a client expressed dissatisfaction or frustration, or let’s face it, anger and hostility.
So what do we do? How do we approach this situation? What do we do when the feedback we receive is hurtful?
A Unique Responsibility
As clinicians, our role goes beyond that of typical interpersonal relationships. We are healers, listeners, and guides to our clients, offering them a safe space to explore their emotions and experiences. When a client becomes upset or frustrated, it becomes a unique opportunity for us to understand their inner world better.
When faced with criticism or anger from a client, it's only human to have personal reactions. These reactions can range from anger to defensiveness or hurt. However, as clinicians, it's our responsibility to set aside these personal responses and engage without judgment.
The Challenge of Emotional Detachment
Emotional detachment can be incredibly challenging, especially when a client's feedback triggers our own emotional responses. It's like asking someone to be an angel when they're facing anger or hurt. However, it's essential to remember that our obligation is to explore what's happening for the client without projecting our emotions onto the situation.
Normalizing the Struggle
When a client brings anger or frustration into the therapy room, it’s an opportunity. By staying curious and open, we can help the client understand how their emotions manifest. Handling these situations with grace and curiosity isn't easy. It often takes years of experience and self-reflection to become a pro. So it’s totally normal for clinicians to feel shaken, offended, or even hurt when getting challenging feedback. What matters is the commitment to growth and improvement in our practice.
Understand & Break the Cycle
Clients often respond to hurt and anger in ways developed through their past experiences. Their reactions may involve escalation, withdrawal, aggression, or even manipulation. These responses are their coping mechanisms, shaped by their history.
Breaking this cycle requires asking the client about their emotional responses. Encouraging them to reflect on why they feel the way they do can be transformative. It also provides an opportunity for the client to learn to communicate their emotions more effectively.
The Importance of Trust
Many clients may have never experienced someone genuinely interested in understanding their emotions without judgment. Building trust in the therapeutic relationship is a crucial step towards helping clients open up and express themselves more authentically.
While we strive to create a safe space for clients to explore their emotions, some may not be ready for these conversations. It's important to recognize that not every client is prepared to engage in this level of introspection, and that's okay. It's not a reflection of our abilities as clinicians.
Handling challenging feedback from clients is an essential part of a clinician's journey, a messy one, I might add. But when approaching these situations with curiosity and a genuine desire to help, clinicians can truly make a difference in their clients' lives. Also, seeking support may be the only thing to help you get through these moments.
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Tweetable Quotes
"The hope is that over time, once you get used to it, and once you understand a little bit more of how you respond in these situations, you can get better at this." - Rachelle Heinemann
"So what we're doing is slowing things way down. What was it about what I said that made you angry? What was it about what I said that really hurt you? This allows them to start getting curious about their own anger and about the way that they express their anger." - Rachelle Heinemann
They are learning that they can trust people to be able to hear them when they just communicate with words. They don't have to get super loud. They can learn that the other person will hear what they have to say." - Rachelle Heinemann
Related Episodes
Episode 90. How Do I learn to Trust Myself? with Diane Barth, LCSW
Episode 79. When Recovery Isn’t Quite Recovery At All
Episode 77. How to Accept Your Body
More From Rachelle
Hey there! I’m Rachelle, the host of the Understanding Disordered Eating Podcast. As a Licensed Mental Health Counselor, I work with clients to make sense of life’s messy emotional experiences.
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